Child Visitation & Supervised Visitation

by Marie from Florida

My son and his 1st wife agreed upon my son having visitation every other week from Thursday through Sunday and the usual holiday, Summer schedule. After their divorce, he remarried and had 2 more children and ultimately relocated in another state.

He recently went through his 2nd divorce. As a result of the tumultuous relationship he was in during his 2nd marriage and the subsequent divorce, my son was arrested for armed robbery (his 2nd ex-wife said he stole her cell phone and that he had a weapon), stalking (his 2nd ex-wife said he was following her) breaking and entering (his 2nd ex-wife said he forced his way into her home).

He posted bond and is out of jail. He has not gone to court yet. However, the State that he was in has allowed him to return to the State where his 1st wife is located pending his court date. Now, the 1st wife is refusing to allow him to see their child unless he signs a paper stating that he will be allowed to see their child 2 weekends per month (if the child's schedule allows it), and the usual holiday schedule, Summer visitation will be the same 2 weekends per month (if the child's schedule allows it).

The paper states that these visits must be supervised at all times by me. My son does not want to sign the paper. He says he has not been convicted of these crimes and refuses to sign her paper. He says he has the original visitation schedule in place and plans on keeping it.

However, his 1st ex-wife has said he could not see her and she would take this to court. Any advice for him? Should he just accept her offer of 2 weekends per month (if the child's schedule permits) or should he pursue the visitation he currently has?

Also, does the 1st ex-wife have the right to stop his visitation prior to any other modification? What are your thoughts in this situation?

Answer to Florida Child Visitation Question

Dear Marie,

Your son is facing serious criminal charges.

My suggestion is that he agree to his first ex-wife's demands with some stipulations.

I suggest, on the paper that he signs with his first ex, he does not admit to any of the criminal charges:

• the visitation is modified only so long as his cases are pending -- once adjudicated, sentenced, dismissed or he is placed on probation the schedule returns as per the court order;

• demand more specificity about visitations than "if the child's schedule permits"; and

• suggest a second alternative person, besides you, for supervised visitation in case your schedule does not permit.

I suggest that the paper also state that this change is in the best interest of the child; is promoting harmony between the former spouses; and is never to be interpreted as him neglecting to visit his children.

He wouldn't want the ex-wife to turn around and tell the court that he didn't visit his children, and try and deny him visitation based on that, after she asked him for these conditions.

It sounds like your son has enough troubles on his hands. To go through a court battle with the first ex-wife over visitation now might cause him considerable stress. And, honestly, my feeling is that the ex-wife, if she went to court to modify visitation, might be awarded even more control.

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